Conference Notes

I feel my first five pages are very successful. I have an introduction that consists of an anecdote. I wrote a story and set a setting for a baseball game. I expressed the feelings involved in the a game. I also gave background information on the triangle of baseball. The players, the organizations, and the fans. I wrote a paragraph for each section and told why each is important in a baseball game. Then I emphasized that the fans are the key importance in baseball.

           

I gave several key examples that emphasize the importance of the fan. I let the reader know that the fans are sometimes forgotten and that people think that the players or the organizations are the most important part of baseball. I let the reader know that fans participate in the game and are the main support base for the players. They area also a financial aspect to baseball. I gave some example of things we can do to keep the fans from coming back. I also provided examples of what would happen if we lost the fan base completely. Then I gave personal opinions from actual fans to support my position. Finally I gave my personal opinion and shared my own experience.

            The meeting with Dr. Archibald was very helpful. He told me to write more of a forecast. He feels my examples are very good and supportive. I need to be more descriptive in my introduction and set more of tone. I will take his advice and then apply it to my paper. He also told me to write my entire paper and then go back to the introduction. Once all my ideas are down on paper then I can go back and really forecast my introduction. I feel it was very good advice and I am ready to finish my essay.